My husband and I have big extended families, and many family members that live close. We also have lots of friends both near and far, many acquaintances, and a cul de sac of neighbors that we really truly like. But the doorbell rarely rings. I honestly cannot even tell you what it sounds like.
In today’s world, no one dares just “drop by” on each other. My husband and I both grew up without cell phones or ipads. We grew up in a world where your best friends and any activities you wanted to do were never further than a bike ride away, you carpooled with 6 other kids if you had to go further, and neighbors and friends regularly dropped in or called to catch up. We didn’t have a doorbell, but I still remember the sound of knocking on the screen door.
Our modern-day friendships consist of text messages, commenting on each other’s social media posts, and somehow feeling closer to each other’s lives from the snippets we see on Facebook. But when was the last time your doorbell actually rang (other than the UPS driver dropping off your latest online purchase)?
Social media has allowed us to keep tabs on more acquaintances than ever before, but we’ve somehow substituted our few close relationships for hundreds of online surface-only “friends.” Prime example – this year my husband had 71 people wish him Happy Birthday on Facebook., and about 20 sent him a text. Not one single person called or stopped in. Think about that for a bit the next time you worry about “bothering someone.”
I fully admit my husband and I are guilty of this too!
We see how busy people are with activities, trips, remodels, and our lives have only gotten busier as well. We think people are “too busy” for phone calls and random drop-ins. Not to mention, Pinterest tells us that other peoples’ homes look like Joanna Gaines decorated them! We believe that other people don’t have stacks of papers lining their counters, toys scattered across their floors, and dog hair clumps in the corners (but let’s get real, we all do). This illusion makes us never want to show off our own homes. Who wants to see my tornado of a house? Some of us actually fear someone stopping by. With a crazy barking dog and kids that still nap, I have to admit I’m guilty too of fearing the doorbell!
But…
What would happen if we stopped fearing the doorbell?
What would happen if we tried reaching out to our neighbors, family and friends?
What’s the worst that could happen if you rang your neighbor’s doorbell and stopped by to bring over a hot cup of coffee?
What might happen if you dropped off your extra desert to the elderly woman next door after dinner?
Or, if someone drops off a cup of coffee or desert for you, what if you invited them in regardless of the mess? Or, baby steps – what if you invited them to sit with you for ten minutes on the porch?
I know we are all busy. I know our schedules are packed full. I know many of us think we don’t want anyone dropping by unannounced on us. BUT, if you think of it this week – remind someone what their doorbell sounds like. It might be just the sound they need to hear. And, just maybe – it’s the sound you need to hear too.
It’s likely the sound I need to hear too.
